Why Date or Court? (or any other social practice as the previous two)

[PrezLeefun]

So here is the question- Why do we date or court and what purpose does it serve? This statement was made by kate on the "Boyfriend Now! I'm desperate..." thread.

"I didn't date to find a bf." (bf stands for boy friend)

Do most people have kate's opinion about dating? Are there long term reasons for dating? Is dating or courtship just a healthy social activity that holds little purpose?

Go on, rant!

[Paula]

It's better to date than to have the parents pick out your mate. How else would you find a SO?

[HomeschoolrsRUs]

It's better to date than to have the parents pick out your mate. How else would you find a SO?

It's not an either/or proposition. One doesn't have to "date" to find a mate. Dating is a man-made creation -- it presents a false picture, and sets the "daters" up for a whole slew of uncomfortable, inappropriate situations.

Prez, you pretty much know my beliefs on this issue, I don't have too much more to add. I will, however, reprint the reasons my family will not allow our children to "date."


I found this, and I think it really sums up MY thoughts:
Found here: Dating vs. Courtship: Part 7 (http://polynate.net/books/courtship/part7.html)

Today's model of "Recreational Dating"... <!-- IKDG -->

leads to intimacy but not necessarily to commitment.
tends to skip the "friendship" stage of a relationship.
often mistakes a physical relationship for love.
often isolates a couple from other vital relationships.
in many cases, distracts young adults from their primary responsibility of preparing for the future.
can cause discontentment with God's gift of singleness.
creates an artificial environment for evaluating another person's character. <!-- DIIWTR? -->
develops a self-centered, feeling-oriented concept of love.
teaches people to break off difficult relationships, conditioning them more for divorce than marriage.
develops an appetite for variety and change, creating dissatisfation within marriage.
causes late marriages, leaving more time for falling into sins associated with singleness.
promotes lust and moderate sexual activity, opening the door for fornication.
creates a permanent endorphin-bond between two people who will not spend their lives together.
creates a standard of comparison by which mates are first chosen, but after marriage rejected.
lacks the protections and guidance afforded by parental involvement of courtship.
doesn't prepare children to face "life's realities" -- it warps life's realities!
devalues sex and marriage.
destroys fellowship, leaving Christians alienated and ineffective for cooperative ministry. <!-- NB, i.e. me :-) -->
embarks on a romantic progression before people are ready to follow through (and commit to marriage)
encourages short-term relationships over long-term friendships

[jag]

Free meals and movies :grin:

[Charity]

True Love Waits
http://www.lifeway.com/tlw/students/join.asp (http://www.lifeway.com/tlw/students/join.asp)


Chastity...Abstinence...Dating
http://www.chastitycall.org/ (http://www.chastitycall.org/)


kissed dating goodbye
http://www.joshharris.com/ikdg/ikdgmain.htm (http://www.joshharris.com/ikdg/ikdgmain.htm)


Godly Courtship from Charity Ministries
http://www.charityministries.org/tapeministry/tapelist.cfm?Where=category_description&value=Courtship (http://www.charityministries.org/tapeministry/tapelist.cfm?Where=category_description&value=Courtship)

[Rink]

been single for 41 years, I have a man and am happy he, like I are of the same mind, we are both committment-minded and we BOTH are of the mind to make it last, we are both patient and very careful in how we go about this courtship.

Its not dating, its courtship.

I've never 'dated' and dont care to, it distracts me from what I want in life, and that is 'COMMITTMENT' and dating does not give that.

I have for many many years asked God to give me a good man thats committment-minded, and He has.

by dating i would feel like i was betraying what i was looking for in the first place, a committment-minded mate.

I dont need dates.

Never bothered and dont miss it.

Am single, celibate and keeping myself to high standards because I WANT to.

Because if I hold true to myself and what is right, i will have the best that Life can give me.

And I'm patient about it also.

[Primitive]

been single for 41 years, I have a man and am happy he, like I are of the same mind, we are both committment-minded and we BOTH are of the mind to make it last, we are both patient and very careful in how we go about this courtship.

Its not dating, its courtship.

I've never 'dated' and dont care to, it distracts me from what I want in life, and that is 'COMMITTMENT' and dating does not give that.

I have for many many years asked God to give me a good man thats committment-minded, and He has.

by dating i would feel like i was betraying what i was looking for in the first place, a committment-minded mate.

I dont need dates.

Never bothered and dont miss it.

Am single, celibate and keeping myself to high standards because I WANT to.

Because if I hold true to myself and what is right, i will have the best that Life can give me.

And I'm patient about it also.

I'm with you...
I'd rather spend my time waiting for God to send me a nice young lady than go through several other women and broken hearts. There is no point to me dating for being social...I want all or nothing :)