Planet X

[Lopeover]

I was listening to Coast to Coast and heard about this mysterious planet that is suppose to cross through our solar system and disrupt our earth current axis? Is anyone familiar with this?

[**DONOTDELETE**]

Check here. (http://xfacts.com/planetx2003hype.html)

http://xfacts.com/xhome.gif

[Timberwolf]

Or....you could click here.... (http://www.zetatalk.com/)

http://www.zetatalk.com/zetatalk.gif

/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icon133.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icon121.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icon109.gif

[Lopeover]

Thanks for the information.

[Kerry]

Zeta Talk provides amusing reading for a Sunday morning.

[DoctorDoom]

Don't lose any sleep over it.

If the squirrels could eat all the nuts on the web, they'd weigh 50 pounds each.

[**DONOTDELETE**]

[ QUOTE ]
Lopeover said:
I was listening to Coast to Coast and heard about this mysterious planet that is suppose to cross through our solar system and disrupt our earth current axis? Is anyone familiar with this?

[/ QUOTE ]

Planet X is where King Ghidorah is from!

[nosferatuscoffin]

Since I subscribe to my own belief that liberalism is indeed a genetic defect, I think that if it is ever proved that Planet X does indeed exist, we will finally have solved one of the Great Mysteries of our time.

Where did liberals come from? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif

Nos

[DoctorDoom]

For the oldies in the crowd who remember Space Patrol, Planet X was the hideout/empire of Price Baccarati.

[Chris]

[ QUOTE ]
nosferatuscoffin said:
Since I subscribe to my own belief that liberalism is indeed a genetic defect, I think that if it is ever proved that Planet X does indeed exist, we will finally have solved one of the Great Mysteries of our time.

Where did liberals come from? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Can we put them back? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif

[**DONOTDELETE**]

[ QUOTE ]
nosferatuscoffin said:
Since I subscribe to my own belief that liberalism is indeed a genetic defect, I think that if it is ever proved that Planet X does indeed exist, we will finally have solved one of the Great Mysteries of our time.

Where did liberals come from? /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif

Nos





[/ QUOTE ]


Hell /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icon29.gif

[ChainGun]

Zeta Talk.........If you are reading this on 03/14/03 or later you now have all the proof you need that it is and was all just Zeta Bulls**t. X is a no show.

[Timberwolf]

Actually, Marduke (Planet X, whatever) isn't supposed to be here until 5/17/2003 or there abouts...we've got a couple months to go.

[DoctorDoom]

An update on Planet X:

Researching the archives has revealed that this planet, the only known source of Illudium Phosdex, the shaving-cream atom, will be destroyed in the 24½ century by Duck Dodgers and Marvin the Martian. Since the stalwart hero had to pass planets A through W, and we have seen none of them yet, It may thus be safely concluded that Planet X poses no danger to Earth in our century.

Sorry, conspiracy fans, it's a false alarm. The Zetans lied AGAIN.

[DesertFox]

Not Al "Tree" Bore! He's a certified wal-nut.

[Timberwolf]

Gosh golly gee whiz...here it is May 18, 2003 and things are still as they were a couple months ago...guess those loons at ZetaTalk are feeling pretty stoooooopid right about now.

LOL

[DoctorDoom]

And now it's May 19, 2003, and the skies are still clear. But, could it be that the Zeta Reticulans landed their flying saucers on it and pushed it into a different trajectory to miss Earth? Yeah, THAT'S what happened. We were SAVED by the awesomely superior technology of the benificent Zetans.

Anyone who has been following the saucer nonsense over the decades knows that the aliens were full of dire warnings of this or that thing happening to our little blue marble. BUT, the aliens always stated that they would do their best to prevent said catastrophes.

When they didn't happen, the obvious conclusion was that the aliens succeeded in their efforts, bless their blond, Aryan souls.

And, we also know that the aliens have perfected the science of levitation, which is proved by the fact that we have never found footprints of aliens.

[nosferatuscoffin]

Indeed. I am sure the Dems feel like they are on Planet X right now. And there is no Spaceman Spiff or Duck Dodgers to help them out either.

[Dash_Riprock]

I know a lot of jokes are spun about a "Planet X" existing out there, but any reputable astronomer will tell you that there must significant orbital body that lies beyond Pluto. There is simply too much unexplained gravitational influence being exerted on the outer planets.

[TheRealLobo]

[ QUOTE ]
Timberwolf said:
Gosh golly gee whiz...here it is May 18, 2003 and things are still as they were a couple months ago...guess those loons at ZetaTalk are feeling pretty stoooooopid right about now.

LOL

[/ QUOTE ]

Wait a minute TW...The Zeta date system is a bit different than ours, and they put 5/18/03...In fact the date represents the third day, of the 18th month of the hour 1221203 (their year is represented by the number of hours which have elapsed since the birth of the fourth in a litter of two-headed kittens on a planet in the Rigel system). Which, according to my calculations will be the third day of Zintuary, 1221203..or approximately noon tomorrow by our calendar. Keep in mind my calculations could be off by as many as 5000 hours, so, keep to the caves until at least 5000 hours have passed starting tomorrow.

[Timberwolf]

http://freeconservatives.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smack.gif

DOH!!! I knew thaaaaaat!

LOL

[TheRealLobo]

[ QUOTE ]
Timberwolf said:
http://freeconservatives.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smack.gif

DOH!!! I knew thaaaaaat!

LOL

[/ QUOTE ]

Easy enough to forget if you've miscalibrated your calendar.

Happens all the time.

I was in agreement with you earlier until I looked at the "Pocket Guide to the Xeno Races" that I keep in my desk. Absolutely NO way I could keep up with all the non-local calendar systems without it. Remember, I work for the gov't.

http://freeconservatives.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif http://freeconservatives.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif http://freeconservatives.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif http://freeconservatives.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tinhat.gif

[DoctorDoom]

As the Official Terran Ambassador for the Combined Alliance/Federation Galactic Union, I hereby notify you that as of next week (Earth time), ALL planets of the CAFGU will adopt Universal Star Time, based upon one rotation of the planet Xillfex Greb in the system of Arcturus, equal to 27 hours, 38 minutes, 6.9945023443546 seconds in our measure. All planets will then be rotationally adjusted to synchronize with Xillfex Greb.

It is acknowledged that this process will result in minor inconveniences for some worlds, such as Banaluk in the Deneb system, which now rotates every 1544.633 hours and has a surface gravity of 0.094% of Earth normal. The rotational adjustment will cause everything on the surface to fly off into space, but it's a small price to pay for uniformity. And, the Banalukians never were much to look at anyway (envision twelve-meter high piles of dog vomit with sixteen eyes, who communicate by ejecting pieces of themselves at each other).

In any case, the standard will bring the scale of conformity to a new plateau, and will initiate an exciting and rewarding era of interstellar cooperation.

Note, please, that the Zeta Reticulans refused to cooperate with this standardization and were therefore subjected to disciplinary action. On or about July 19, 2040, a fairly brief but quite spectacular supernova will be seen in the constellation of Reticulum.

The Union takes compliance seriously.

[TheRealLobo]

[ QUOTE ]
DoctorDoom said:
...
Note, please, that the Zeta Reticulans refused to cooperate with this standardization and were therefore subjected to disciplinary action. On or about July 19, 2040, a fairly brief but quite spectacular supernova will be seen in the constellation of Reticulum.

The Union takes compliance seriously.

[/ QUOTE ]

Darn!!! Now I have to change my reservations....(sigh)

[DoctorDoom]

Not a problem. There's a nice little planet in the Pleiades cluster that has just been opened for tourism. It's roughly equal to our tropics in climate, and aside from mosquitoes the size of pterodactyls, its fauna is generally benign.

It will soon become The Place To Go in the interstellar tourism business, so reserving quickly is recommended. Call 1-800-SEM-JASE for details.

[TheRealLobo]

[ QUOTE ]
DoctorDoom said:
Not a problem. There's a nice little planet in the Pleiades cluster that has just been opened for tourism. It's roughly equal to our tropics in climate, and aside from mosquitoes the size of pterodactyls, its fauna is generally benign.

It will soon become The Place To Go in the interstellar tourism business, so reserving quickly is recommended. Call 1-800-SEM-JASE for details.

[/ QUOTE ]

I called and spoke to a gentleman named Veet Vookagig, and he tried to take my reservation, but spent nearly twenty minutes lamenting the loss of all of his pens. He then passed me to a sweet young lady named Trillian, who reserved me a room with mosquito fencing for that particular week. We should be able to see the supernova with the naked eye.

I'm looking forward to it.

Thanks for the tip, and I'll send pictures.

[Timberwolf]

LOL!!!

You guys are tooooo much!!!

[nosferatuscoffin]

[ QUOTE ]
TheRealLobo said:
I called and spoke to a gentleman named Veet Vookagig, and he tried to take my reservation, but spent nearly twenty minutes lamenting the loss of all of his pens. He then passed me to a sweet young lady named Trillian, who reserved me a room with mosquito fencing for that particular week. We should be able to see the supernova with the naked eye.


[/ QUOTE ]

What a rip off. For me that is. Whilst transporting from Venus to Mars to Earth and then to Ganymede and waiting in line for hours on end, the stewardess (who looked like a piece of 12 week old pizza sitting underneath a men's urinal) told my companion Trent and myself that our reservations had expired 12 bleems ago and that we had to do a snipe hunt in order to get back in the good graces of Vogon (that is, when he is not wearing the Bebal fish in his ear) so we could reserve another ticket.

Well, while getting a headlight from a '34 Chevy in Cleveland (Item #6 in the hunt list) Trent accidentally burped in a way that matched acoustics of the Zelderiod Planet's National anthem. Well, they were none too pleased with that, so they beamed him over to their Capital city, strapped him to a Woghort missle and launched him 75 feet to the right of Pluto.

Sigh. At this rate, I will pay have to pay 10,000 Ferengi credits just to watch the pay-per-view version of the supernova.

[TheRealLobo]

[ QUOTE ]
nosferatuscoffin said:
[ QUOTE ]
TheRealLobo said:
I called and spoke to a gentleman named Veet Vookagig, and he tried to take my reservation, but spent nearly twenty minutes lamenting the loss of all of his pens. He then passed me to a sweet young lady named Trillian, who reserved me a room with mosquito fencing for that particular week. We should be able to see the supernova with the naked eye.


[/ QUOTE ]

What a rip off. For me that is. Whilst transporting from Venus to Mars to Earth and then to Ganymede and waiting in line for hours on end, the stewardess (who looked like a piece of 12 week old pizza sitting underneath a men's urinal) told my companion Trent and myself that our reservations had expired 12 bleems ago and that we had to do a snipe hunt in order to get back in the good graces of Vogon (that is, when he is not wearing the Bebal fish in his ear) so we could reserve another ticket.

Well, while getting a headlight from a '34 Chevy in Cleveland (Item #6 in the hunt list) Trent accidentally burped in a way that matched acoustics of the Zelderiod Planet's National anthem. Well, they were none too pleased with that, so they beamed him over to their Capital city, strapped him to a Woghort missle and launched him 75 feet to the right of Pluto.

Sigh. At this rate, I will pay have to pay 10,000 Ferengi credits just to watch the pay-per-view version of the supernova.




[/ QUOTE ]

Just got word. A buddy and his wife were planning on coming with us, but they've cancelled. I have reservations for a suite, but the front room has no mosquito fencing. If you want to buy their reservation, and bring your shotgun, you'd be a welcome companion. You can meet Mrs Lobo and Little Lobo.

[DoctorDoom]

For those who don't have the time for an extended stay on tourist-trap planets, I'm told that Milliway's and MickeyD's have joined forces and will be constructing the MacDonald's at The End Of The Zetas, using the same temporal-loop technology that served the original Milliway's so well for years.

It will be located on a deep-space station 0.01 light-years from the supernova. The show promises to be truly spectacular at that distance. 900-level sunblock will be available for those with organic bodies or components in their biomech constructs.

The Big Macs will be served raw and will cook internally in the customers.

Note: Happy Meals will come with little plastic action figures of melted greys with their big googly eyes exploded like eggs in a nuker. Some children may find this mildly unsettling, but it can be used as an object lesson in the dire consequences of pissing off the Union.