Putdowns from grade school

[EveningStar]

Remember when you were in grade school and you traded insults with your classmates? How many of these do you remember? :D


Rolling your brain down the edge of a razor blade is like rolling a BB down a 27-lane super highway.

If brains were dynamite, you couldn't blow your nose.

If you had a wooden leg, you'd be shit-on-a-stick.

(you shout this at the person who honks his car horn) Your horn blows! How about you?

I saved your life the other day. I killed a shit-eating dog.

Hey! What's that flashing sign on your upper lip say? (peering closely) Dick's Drive-in!

I'd beat the shit out of you, but I wouldn't know what to do with your clothes afterward.

I stuck up for you today. Someone told me you stunk and I told him, "like shit" you did.

If cum was water, your mouth would be the Pacific Ocean.

If you've finished your lunch would you mind removing your spoon from my butt?

If you don't tell anyone about my wooden dick, I won't tell anyone about the splinters in your mouth.

If you don't tell anyone about my rubber dick, I won't tell anyone about the skid-marks in your mouth.

[Longhorn_Platinum]

:rolleyes: Wow, you must have gone to a really trashy school. The only one of those I remember was the one about the wooden dick, & that was in junior high. The ones I remember most from grade school were:

"That's about as funny as a submarine with screen doors."

"That's about as funny as a one-legged man in a kick fight."

"(Sung to the tune of "Reveille") There's a German in the grass, with a bullet up his ass, get it out, get it out, like a good girl scout."

:moo: And the ever popular...

"Teacher, teacher, I declare, I see someone's underwear. Are they purple, are they pink, boy oh boy, do they stink."

:smirky: With today's youth, that last one would be totally worn out.

[EveningStar]

I think it actually might have been junior high school afterall. :)

[Eagle1]

the trump was the classic E.T. line "penis breath"

in grade school all you had to do was use a few big words and those dumb shits would slink away.
either that or settle it on the far side of the school yard where the teachers couldnt see.

[UhUhNoWay]

Gosh, ours were much more benign,
I'm rubber and you're glue what you say bounces off me and sticks to you.
I know you are but what am I (infinity!)

[Large_Al]

Did your parents have any kids that lived.

Remember when you where a kid and you used to sit on your front stoop and blow bubbles. I saw Bubbles the other day and he asked about you.

You're so ugly your momma had to tie a pork chop on to your ass just to get the dog to play with you.

How tall are you? I didn't know they could pile s#$t that high!

[Wolfcounsel]

The only one I heard was the one about the BB, on a six-lane highway.

[Teenager]

I went to a homeschool.... So I don't remember any of those trashy words :thumb:

[Red-voting Badger]

Overheard from some of my high school students that were bantering. Student 1 makes fun of student 2 for about 10 minutes with no response from student 2. As the kids continue to laugh, student 1 finally becomes impatient and in a last ditch effort to make fun of student 2 exclaims, "Don't you have any comebacks?!" To which student 2 deadpans, "If I wanted my cum back, I'd have to scrape it off your mom's face." Needless to say, that was the winner in the argument as the whole class turned to laughing at the instigator.

[Melz]

:moo: And the ever popular...

"Teacher, teacher, I declare, I see someone's underwear. Are they purple, are they pink, boy oh boy, do they stink."



And the ever popular

"I see London, I see France, I see LP's underpants! Not too big, not too small, just the size of the Dayton Mall!"

hehe okay that was the only undies one I remember (I didn't get made fun of so much, I don't remember many of these examples) and although it didn't mention LP, I can just IMAGINE his underpants at the dayton mall !

LOL :)

[Timberwolf]

"You're so full of crap, your eyes are brown"

"If I want any crap outta you, I'll squeeze your head and pick your teeth"

[Timberwolf]

...and maybe we could tone down the sexual inuendos?? This thread can be read by the young'uns....

Thanks

[DeclinetoState]

No sexual innuendo here: "You're so low you have to climb a ladder to tie your shoes."

"[DeclinetoState], you're a has-been."

"Better a has-been than a never was."