Wyatt_Junker
08-08-2007, 12:53 AM
My wife's going away for a night with my two boys.
I have roughly 40 hours or so of absolutely no obligations whatsoever to anyone other than myself.
I'm giddy with solipsist delight.
Things I shall do...
1) Walk around wearing only a t-shirt and argyle socks. ('argyle' because I'm classy like that.)
2) Drink milk right out of the container. I might even let a little trickle down the corner of my mouth and down my chin.
3) I will then grab an entire block of cheddar cheese, a huge chunk of it, hold it in my right hand and gnaw on it like a beaver. The cheese will remain completely unwrapped in its natural form and I will lay it wherever I please throughout the day and plunk it down like a paperweight.
4) Take the screen off the window nearest the TV. Open window. Shoot pellet gun at random objects from living room couch while I watch Bonds try to break Hank Aaron's record.
5) Dip whole hand into peanut butter jar and eat it from fingertips. Try not to get it on my beard or t-shirt, but if I do, what the hell.
6) Practice improvisational dance moves in hallway next to kitchen. Work the whole box step, cross body lead, rondos, the gancho and how to articulate a clean radius from side to side.
6) Curl up with a warm blankey and a half gallon of mint-n-chip ice cream and watch the Lifetime Network. Cry as often as needed in-between spoonfuls.
I have roughly 40 hours or so of absolutely no obligations whatsoever to anyone other than myself.
I'm giddy with solipsist delight.
Things I shall do...
1) Walk around wearing only a t-shirt and argyle socks. ('argyle' because I'm classy like that.)
2) Drink milk right out of the container. I might even let a little trickle down the corner of my mouth and down my chin.
3) I will then grab an entire block of cheddar cheese, a huge chunk of it, hold it in my right hand and gnaw on it like a beaver. The cheese will remain completely unwrapped in its natural form and I will lay it wherever I please throughout the day and plunk it down like a paperweight.
4) Take the screen off the window nearest the TV. Open window. Shoot pellet gun at random objects from living room couch while I watch Bonds try to break Hank Aaron's record.
5) Dip whole hand into peanut butter jar and eat it from fingertips. Try not to get it on my beard or t-shirt, but if I do, what the hell.
6) Practice improvisational dance moves in hallway next to kitchen. Work the whole box step, cross body lead, rondos, the gancho and how to articulate a clean radius from side to side.
6) Curl up with a warm blankey and a half gallon of mint-n-chip ice cream and watch the Lifetime Network. Cry as often as needed in-between spoonfuls.