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Questions I need answered - from a high-priced hooker [Archive] - FreeConservatives

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Gato es Verde
03-15-2008, 08:14 AM
Questions the green cat needs answered.


Is Pretty Woman (1990) a cult classic with hookers? Do they get together in their hooker-circles, drink box-wine and watch "Pretty Woman" - reciting all the lines in unison and giggling like the innocent school girls they never were?

Does every high priced hooker dream of doing a guy like Richard Gere and being swept off her feet?

Do Johns usually look more like Richard Gere or more like George Costanza?

Once you turn 28 or so, are your hooking days over? Or is it like Major League Baseball where 27 is when you hit your stride?

Speaking of sports - can you talk sports? There's a girl that cuts my hair and she talks baseball better than I do. If I'm paying that kind of money for something I can actually do myself in the shower, I want entertainment coming out of every orifice. Oh, incidentally, can you do arm-farts?


Now, lets get down to the NITTY GRITTY.


If you're a thousand dollars an hour - how much for 3-7 minutes? Because FoxNews is telling me short sex is good for me (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,335110,00.html). $1,000 is pretty steep but if it's only $16.50 a minute, I can probably afford up to 7-8 minutes, maybe 9.

Do you barter? Because I have a garage-full of samples of medical supplies that I use in my business. Seriously, what can I get for a case of 60,000 sterile Q-Tips? How about the sexual name-sake of an SUV manufactured in South Bend, Indiana... can I get one of those in trade for Q-Tips?

I don't know if there's any high-priced hookers lurking on Free Conservatives or not, but if there are, please chime in. Inquiring cats want to know.

Riverboat
03-15-2008, 08:29 AM
I'd ask if she gives coupons for penicillin with every visit.

DesertFox
03-15-2008, 01:55 PM
Yeah. And my friend Wyatt wants to know if you do kinky sex, weird sex, strange sex, or if it's all missionary stuff. Do you peel the banana? do you do stuff the pepper? How about high-low-two-jacks-and-the-game?

Timberwolf
03-15-2008, 02:30 PM
There's a couple of wild and crazy guys over here that wanna know if these large-breasted, American foxes make strange animal sounds when they have sex.

DesertFox
03-15-2008, 02:35 PM
I just wanna know if it's better when it costs $1000/hour than when it's won in a fair fight between the sexes. :D